|
|
|
Remembering William
|
March 2008
|
|
|
|
|
|
We were there to celebrate the life of William
Schultz. Because the viewing and burial had taken place the day before, I held
out hope that we could praise God despite the pain of losing someone so young.
Then I saw the sober expressions and tear-filled eyes of several friends who had
not attended the previous day’s services and realized: Before these women could
give thanks for William’s life, they had to grieve the loss of it.
Even the pastor
found it difficult to speak when a wave of emotion left him without words as he
stood up to deliver the message. “I wasn’t
expecting that to happen,” he confessed.
None of us were. I remember how shocked I
was a few days earlier when a friend called on New Year’s Eve to say that one of
the women from our Girls’ Night Out group had walked into her son’s bedroom that
morning to find that his trach (tracheostomy) tube had come out during the
night. The news rendered me speechless as I pictured the little boy who beat
cancer, toddling into heaven anyway at the age of sixteen months and twenty-one
days.[i]
I
started to ask why and then reminded myself of the futility of the question.
Just as none of us by worrying can add a single hour to our lives[ii],
no one by asking why could add a single day to William’s.
Searching for answers won’t bring
a loved one back, but it will hold us back if we let it. Joyce Meyer made this clear
in her book, Conflict Free Living, when she said: “Anger toward God will stop us in our tracks and keep us from moving
forward. It is a ‘spiritual roadblock’ ... because anger closes the door to the
only one who can help”.[iii]
If resentment closes the
door to God, then optimism must open it for everyone who holds fast to the promise that “in all
things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called
according to his purpose.”[iv]
Our purpose that morning was to give thanks for a precious little
boy.
“We’re here
today to celebrate William’s legacy,” the pastor announced.
His words made me feel more curious than
comforted. How could someone so young—a child who just learned to
wink upon
request and walk unassisted—leave a legacy?
Although I was
unsure of William’s contribution, I knew that I would always remember his
parents for the way they handled both their son’s illness and his recent absence.
At a time when many
people’s faith would be shaken, theirs seemed to deepen as they turned
to, instead of away from God.
The strength this couple showed throughout
their son’s chemotherapy treatments and long hospital stays was evident to
everyone
who read the online journal
entries they
created to keep friends and family updated on William’s progress. Although there
were many examples to choose from, one that stood out to me was typed after an especially difficult day where William’s trach was removed during
a checkup only to find that he still desperately needed it.
Just hours after
watching her child turn blue and go limp as the doctor struggled to put
in a new tube, Amanda ended her update by saying: “This was probably the
most sickening and scary day of my life. But, now off to rest some, and resting
in the peace of Jesus is a pretty amazing place to be.” [v]
The couple
seemed to be resting in this same peace during the service as I glanced across
the aisle to see Amanda offer an encouraging smile to a family member who stood
up to read from scripture. Her husband was equally composed as he doted on their
three-year-old daughter, who was sitting on his lap.
I don't know why their behavior surprised
me. The apostle Paul tells us to give thanks in all circumstances in
his letter to the Thessalonians.[vi]
Why then did I see them as leading by example, instead of merely following
Paul’s? If I
had to guess, it’s because so few of us are able to do the same. |
|
|
|
Links For You
When William turned one, Amanda and Bill created a slideshow
to document his first
year. Viewing it made me want to download the song they used and do
the same for each of my daughters.
William's First Year
If you are
grieving the loss of a loved one or working to overcome past
mistakes, may you find strength in the struggle as you listen to the
song Broken by
Lindsey Haun.
Broken Video
Broken Lyrics
An Organizing Tip Or Two
Click on the
link below to view
tips for:
Storing Schoolwork
A Verse To Heed
“Dear friends,
let us love one another, for love comes from God.”
(1 John 4:7a)
Books To Read
Click on the image above to view a description of this book.
Click on the image above to view a description of this book.
|
|
|
It’s
hard to do what you’re told when you don’t understand why
you are doing it. Maybe that’s why authors Jennifer
Schuchmann and Craig Chapin devoted page 105 of their book
Your Unforgettable Life to a story about a man
named Jim who, after facing some tough personal issues, also
wondered why Paul would tell readers to be so upbeat when
circumstances were getting him down.
“I
hated Paul,” Jim said. “He says to rejoice in our suffering,
but even Jesus didn’t rejoice in His suffering. Instead, He
prayed that if it were God’s will, His cup would be taken
away and His suffering end.”
It
wasn't until the end of a
difficult year that Jim reached the following life changing
conclusion:
“Jesus was the only
person whose suffering took Him away from God. All suffering
since then brings us closer to God if we let it; that’s why
Paul said to rejoice in our suffering—because it brings us
closer to God.”[vii]
The tragedy of losing William
definitely brought Amanda closer to God as I looked again in
her direction to find her singing with eyes closed and one
hand raised to heaven. As I marveled at her strength, it
became clear that she was my role model … because Jesus was
hers. What would life be like if
everyone felt the “peace of God, which transcends all
understanding” that Paul wrote about in Philippians 4:7?
Would we “let go and
let God” for long enough to inspire others to do the same?
Joyce Meyer once said:
“You don’t have control over every circumstance or offense
that comes your way, but you can control your response.”[viii]
My response to the pastor's comment about William's legacy
was bewilderment as I continued to ask myself: How could
a child who was too young to make decisions for himself,
make a difference for Christ?
Searching for an answer, I thought
back to the slideshow that had played earlier in the
service. William was such a happy little boy and, from the
smiling faces of the people in the photos with him, I could
tell that his joy was contagious. As I thought about the love that
he brought to everyone who knew him,
I realized that
the greatest legacy we will ever leave is
not a tangible mark, but a touched heart.
Jesus confirmed the importance of
reaching out to others after a Pharisee asked him this question in Matthew 22:36: “Teacher,
which is the greatest commandment in the Law?”
To
this
God's son replied: “‘Love
the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul
and with all your mind.’ This is the first and
greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your
neighbor as yourself.’” [iv]
Jesus
lived out this love when he died on the cross for sins that
we—not
he—committed.
We owe it to him to do the same by dying to self and
allowing God’s
love to flow through us and into others. That's what I was
doing when I complied with the worship
leader's request to join hands and lift them up to heaven.
Such a public display of adoration isn’t like me. I’m
guessing that it wasn’t like a lot of people as I glanced
around the room to find that no one wanted to go
first. Instead, the air was heavy with hesitation when we
finally reached out to each other. We
did it for William; and as we stood there outside our comfort
zone, I knew that his legacy was secure. It’s not the length
of a life, but the love that flows through it that matters
most. And when that love leads people to Jesus, we have left a
remarkable legacy indeed.
William Schultz
August 10, 2006 - December
31, 2007
Quotes
to Grow On
“It
is not my place to criticize God. Someday my questions will
be answered. For now, I have peace of mind and heart because
I put my trust in a loving God.”
Joyce
Meyer, Conflict Free Living, p. 104
“How we view our spiritual legacy and how we pass it on to
the people we care about is the choice only we can make.”
Jennifer Schuchmann and Craig Chapin, Your Unforgettable
Life, p. 119.
“If
your choice includes loving God, your legacy on earth will
be unforgettable—lasting for a thousand generations—and your
reward will be eternal.”
Jennifer Schuchmann and Craig Chapin, Your Unforgettable
Life, p. 141
[i]
William was
diagnosed with
Neuroblastoma at the age of 4 weeks and declared in
remission 1 year later
[ii]
See Luke 12:25
[iii]
Joyce Meyer, Conflict Free Living, p. 105
[v]
March 15th, 2007 entry of
William Schultz’s Caring Bridge Journal
[vi]
See 1 Thessalonians
5:18
[vii]
Jennifer Schuchmann & Craig Chapin, Your
Unforgettable Life, p. 105
[viii]
Joyce Meyer, Conflict Free Living, p. 107
|
|
|
|
|
|
. |
|
